The other night Susan thought she saw Cousin Lisa.
It took about two seconds, if even that long, to realize it wasn't her. And then to remember why it wasn't her.

In those two seconds an entire universe of happiness was created.
Then it evaporated.
Susan wasn't even sad, she accepted the evaporation and went on with her evening without missing a beat. But for two seconds she was cartwheeling through a field of lavender, as she though she was about to encounter her favorite person.

Susan reflected on this for days; the split-second delight she felt when her brain allowed her to forget before it made her remember. How it didn't bother her then, but it bothers her now. How she doesn't even know if she's grieving effectively.

Susan had a good cry over all this sh*t.


Pix Under the Oaks said...

I still do that with my Mom and she has been gone since 1987. Crying is good if you can squeeze the tears out and let it go. I just did this last week waiting for a diagnostic mammogram on my right boob. I hadn't let the tears go in a long time. Crying over shit that piles up is a great release.

Cupcake Murphy said...

I saw my dad's twin driving the same car my dad used to have the other day and I followed him for several miles just to be near him.