Day three and Susan has nothing to write about.
She told you all that this would happen and yet,
you encouraged her. She hopes you're happy now.
Sit back and hear why Susan was unsatisfied with her lunch today.

One of the perks of Susan's workplace, Acme Sweatshop, is that lunch is provided for the employees. Susan isn't about to b*tch about the hand that feeds her because she generally enjoys her lunches, but not always.

Today, Susan got to lunch late and found a solitary plate of cold pizza waiting for her. This was totally not going to be enough food to carry Susan through the afternoon, neither was it a good looking plate of cold pizza. She went into the kitchen to see what else was available and found a plate of lettuce. Not salad greens with some olives or a tomato, just a plate of lettuce. Even Susan's mother served a better salad back in the '70s.

Susan took the plate of lettuce and the plate of cold pizza and a cup of salad dressing over to a table to join an old Real Estate section of the Times already waiting. She cut up her pizza, dumped it onto the lettuce and poured the dressing over it. She ate it without enthusiasm while reading how it takes over an hour for a fella from Brooklyn to mass transit himself to his girlfriend in upper Manhattan, 14 miles away.

Susan will see you tomorrow.


Rural Rambler said...

I'mStillHappy. I hurried my self over here this morning and as I read a little smile crept across my face because Susan is a very, very good read even when she gets stuck with a crappy lunch and an old section of the Times.

Cupcake Murphy said...

I know you don't believe me but that was hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Pizza caesar salad. Genius.

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA............kinda like a Wedge Salad on both ends!

Sorry to make you keep writing, but we are still reading!