Susan's been writing late at night which has resulted in a decrease in her ability to think up funny sentences.
She's sorry. She wants to be funny for her modest fan base but her little BLAHgy paragraphs take up a lot of time as well as mental effort and she can't do any of this stuff at work because she's really gotten used to being employed. But she takes notes during periods of inspiration and tries to get to the computer before midnight.

Another problem comes from knowing who reads her BLAHg which limits what she is willing to write. Like, her mother. She could have gone in a whole other direction with that. Mothers are funny to make fun of anyway. I mean, wouldn't it be hilarious if she wrote that her mother was like the monkey who ripped the hands and face off that lady? Susan's LOL-ing just thinking about writing that.
But she can't because her mother would cry and that's not funny. Susan absolutely does not want her mother to cry, she doesn't want anybody's mother to cry. You know, because of her.

Susan decided long ago that she didn't want to be mean, just angry. Mean is better done in person when vocal inflections and facial expressions can be employed. Words are easily misunderstood if the right ones are not used in the proper order. Susan's much more comfortable with anger, it sort of fuels her day. Besides, there's plenty to be angry about.
Being broke is a scream, OMG is that funny!
TWISTED bad moods? Funny.
Farts? Funny.
The husband talking while Susan reads the papers? Funny.
Dentists, banks, drunk neighbors? Stop, stop! Susan is doubled over!

Enjoy your Sunday, guys.


The Zadge said...

Am so with you - The Zadge's mother-as-blog-reader definitely limits The Zadge's description of her romantic escapes. That as well as the fact that she hasn't had any lately.

Dawn in Austin said...

Dawn's Dad commented to her once that her blog is pretty tame compared to some others out there. Dawn replied that maybe those bloggers don't care what their parents think. I do and I'm glad you do, too.

And why DO husbands talk when we're trying to read the paper?!

Meg at the Members Lounge said...

Ahh yes. I got myself into a pickle once because of what I wrote. It wasn't a family member or friend, but I quickly realized I had to temper my tales. Wouldn't it be fun to have a secret site we could run amok with comments?

linlah said...

Drunk neighbors naked at your door step, that too is funny.

Cupcake Murphy said...

In my book there are Meanies and Sweeties and Sweeties are generally Angry Nice People. If that makes anyone cry, well, screw them.