This weekend Susan was again seated in the bleachers watching her son wrestle. Her strategy for sitting on something so unforgivingly uncomfortable is to roll her jacket up and stick it underneath her ass.

Anyway, Susan's little sister and brother in law were in attendance and made the hours sitting on the miserable bleachers go by in a more entertaining manner. Susan likes watching the wrestlers, but after a while it's like how much wrestling can a person watch?

For most of the afternoon Susan's little sister & daughter were sitting in front of her. There were stuff and people all over the gym. At her feet were backpacks, gear and Gatorades. There was nowhere to move them so she just arranged her feet around them.

At one point a man sat to the right of Susan. Seats open, get sat in, get abandoned, and so it goes all afternoon. It's like sitting on a bus. Susan and her family members watched the wrestlers, chatted, took pictures, made each other laugh and passed the day in a congenial way.

After a period of time the man next to Susan asked 'Is that your granddaughter?
Susan considered his question and pointing to her kid said 'No, that's my daughter'
The man countered with a surprised 'That's your daughter?' Then - not stopping - he gestured to Susan's sibling, a mere five years her junior, and added 'I thought she was your daughter.'

At first Susan was gobsmacked, but then she realized he must have zeroed in on her chicken neck and ultimately couldn't blame him for thinking she was her own daughter's granny and her sister's mommy.

Susan and five sixths of her cousins met up for their annual summer dinner on City Island. Cousin Caroline was unable to join them, but pictured from left to right are Cousins Veronica, Lisa, Susie, Kathy and Melissa in front.

Yes, Susan's alter ego is known as Cousin Susie.

The cousins always meet at The Black Whale, which has a lovely garden out back under the trees. They stay late into the evening laughing, talking and eating. In fact, Susan's profile picture was taken from one of those summer dinners.

Anyway, it was raining this year so they couldn't eat in the garden.

Inside, the restaurant was filled families and children, crying babies, groups of friends and one slightly older couple seated at a small table diagonally across from the cousins.

It was a terrific evening filled with laughter, happiness, funny stories, and conversations about Captain Andy's upcoming deployment and Cousin Veronica's winter wedding.

OMG, Susie loves her cousins so much!

During the evening Cousin Susie's little sister, Cousin Kathy mentioned that the couple at the small table kept looking over at them. Everyone checked to make sure that their boobs hadn't popped out then went on with their merriment.

A little while later, Cousin Kathy mentioned that the female portion of the couple actually turned around and glared at the cousins in a very dramatic manner.

They thought it odd, but continued with their conversations.

After a bit Cousin Kathy said 'I think they threw something at us' which got the cousins' attention. However, upon closer inspection there was nothing that raised suspicion about the couple at the small table so the cousins went back to discussing Cousin Veronica's wedding dress and deciding what dessert they'd like to order.

Then a big SHUSH! was lobbed at them from the small table at the same time Cousin Kathy discovered the projectile; a wadded up sugar packet which she offered as Exhibit A.

The gloves were off!

The couple paid their check and left while comments went back & forth between the two tables. The cousins waved bye bye and blew kisses as the glaring woman gave them the finger. But when the the departing man told Cousin Veronica 'No one cares about your wedding dress' Cousin Kathy returned the wadded up sugar packet by bouncing it off his head.

None of the other diners even noticed what was going on and the cousins sat there for another hour happily enjoying each other's company before making the long drive home.

It's A Motion Sensor For Crissakes!

Susan takes the expressway when she drives home from work. Every day she encounters a line of cars backed up at the entrance ramp. They're all waiting for the traffic light thing to turn green. Susan is sure you've seen one, it has a red light which remains illuminated, and a green light. As each car rolls up to the traffic light thing it will turn from red to green allowing the car to proceed and Susan to inch a little closer to home. However, if the car does not roll far enough to trip the motion sensor the driver will just sit there staring at the red light while the top of Susan's head explodes.

Susan gets all twitchy just anticipating the entrance ramp, she doesn't need to wait until she gets there. She finds it difficult to believe that people don't understand that the traffic light thing employs a motion sensor.
Even after they sit there for forty or fifty minutes.
Her only hope is that their foot falls asleep and slips off the brake so they roll forward unintentionally.

Why is it even necessary to interfere with people merging onto the expressway? Merging is easy, just drive fast.
People need help backing up. Susan has a terrific and smart girlfriend who won't back up at all. Ever.
Help Susan's friend and stop screwing with Susan's drive home!