3.19.2009

Eggplant

Susan's medium sized children are pretty good about eating their vegetables. This of course can be attributed to the manner in which Susan prepares and serves the vegetables.
Further supportive evidence of Susan's vegetable talents are often provided at the dinner table by unrelated children invited over to eat. Quite often the mothers of these children will remark how their child would never eat such a vegetable at home, making Susan feel superior.
And rightly so because we're talking about hardcore examples such as cauliflower, asparagus and broccoli rabe. Some of them may not be particularly happy about the broccoli rabe, but they eat it.

There's one vegetable that Susan & the husband love but, no matter what she does with it her children refuse to eat;
Eggplant.
Susan's children absolutely gag on the vile eggplant.
One of them even cries when she sees it on her plate, which is one reason (of many) why Susan likes to refer to this child as The Crybaby.

Susan was looking for the easy way out of dinner & wished to serve her family the eggplant left over from a weekend party. Susan's eggplant preparation was such that even Susan's eggplant-resistant little sister was won over. And she's a tough customer.
Nonetheless, Susan had a tougher job ahead of her getting The Crybaby to crack.
If she could weaken The Crybaby then her older brother Fuckleupagus would crumble.
But, how?

What would make The Crybaby voluntarily put eggplant into her mouth, chew it up then swallow it? Repeatedly? Until it was all gone?

Susan put her thinking cap on.

The habit in Susan's house is not to serve soda during the week. However, Susan had a premonition and held onto a bottle left over from the weekend party, everything else was poured down the sink.

Susan approached The Crybaby.
'What can I do to get you to eat some eggplant?'
The Crybaby looked at Susan, pondering the answer. Susan's heart was pounding.
'Money?' suggested Susan. The Crybaby's eyes widened.

In the end The Crybaby sold herself out for $4 and a glass of Sprite Zero.
The family sat down and enjoyed their dinner of leftover eggplant, salad and penne with sauce.

Susan swears she heard someone say 'That wasn't that bad, Mom.'