1.03.2022

Susan has changed over the last two years, she thinks it's due to a combination of advancing decrepitude and Pandemic PTSD. For a while she thought she may be a little ADHD, but those symptoms seemed much more severe than Susan's so she abandoned that diagnosis.

Anyway, Susan doesn't do details anymore. At the very least she's not reliable about details, so it's best to assume she's going to get something wrong. A recent example was when she showed up at her sister's house all decked out for New Year's Eve on December 30th. 

Another manifestation of Susan's current state of mind are the limited amount of things she cares about. It's like her brain doesn't produce enough caring to get through the day, so she distributes it to an established list of recipients and is dismissive about the rest. To her credit, she is able to open up and add extra things to care about, but not if they come with responsibilities.

She can no longer do two things at once (who can, really?). If she's home following a simple recipe displayed directly in front of her while having a hands-free phone conversation, she's leaving out an ingredient. 

Working in isolation has turned her into the type of employee she hates, one who just does the minimum. On her annual evaluation she answered a question about her future goals by saying she had no future goals. She can't even fake it anymore. 

That's one of the biggest symptoms; Susan can't fake it anymore. The best she can hope for is to keep her mouth shut, and sometimes she can't do that much. Even if she can, her face is right there to give her away, like she's a toddler and can't keep from spilling the secret that she hates this sh*t.

Lest she not reveal herself to be a total loser, there are still tons of things Susan does regularly and competently; she gets enough sleep, pays her taxes, waters her plants, maintains her relationships (with enthusiasm), and has hope for the future as long as that illiterate nazi c*cks*cker doesn't get back into office.